Saturday, 28 November 2015

There is No Dog Shame in this House...

they don't know the meaning of that word.
If I was a dragon this would be the pile of discarded bones of my enemies.  Because I'm a dog it's a stick graveyard and also holds the remains of my enemies.  That shark toy, he had it coming.

Oh hi, Happy Thanksgiving!  While you were busy doing other things that garden gnome you brought home from Grandma's house gave me a weird look.

I regret nothing.  I also have no shame.  
I always thought he looked shifty.  So I bited his feets off.  Now he can't get up to any mischief when I'm sleeping and can't protect you.

Also, he was attached to a strange little stick... and I know all sticks for me to eat... so I ate that too.  I know I have an entire pile of sticks in front of the deck that I'm turning into a woodchip pile, but that gnome smelled funny on top of being shifty so I really thought he was a priority for destruction.

You're welcome!

I know you appreciate my work so I just wag my tail when you tell me I'm bad.

Let me think... BAD.  B... A... D... That must be code.  Yeah, code, for brilliant adversary destroyer.  Oh yeah, I'm definitely that.

I'm so good at it.  I'm the best!

I protected my human, ate a stick, and made sure that shifty little gnome will never threaten anyone again.

I'm so happy!

It's already such a great day.  Wake me up when it's time for our walk.

                        Love,
                           Rocky

2 comments:

  1. My poor old dog Georgie sure knew the meaning of the word bad. He would be depressed for hours so I never used it i any other case then the most egregious of acts.
    I would have to tell him he was a good boy a hundred times to make up for saying he was a bad boy one time.

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    1. Poor Georgie. Yes, that must have been difficult for him. In my experience most dogs do know the meaning of the word bad, and respond accordingly. My old dog Meg would assume the posture of the most deflated apologetic sad wreck of a dog that we would forgive her instantly. She knew this of course and was manipulating us. Rocky is not that smart, but happily for Rocky he truly doesn't understand the word bad at all. He has no shame and no regrets.

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